Fine Facebook abusers

I am a giant fan of creativity. By that, I mean I LOVE it when somebody takes

"Add signs to make 15 34 56 50 20 10 = 17" into "15 - (34-56-5)(0) + (20/10) = 17"

Thinking outside the box gets you places. If not academically (teachers don't like smartasses), then mentally. Recently, I had to write an introduction speech for a famous person in one of my classes. We were only allowed to use positives, as it was to motivate an audience into welcoming the guest. Most chose sports figures, or actors. I chose Adolf Hitler, and was praised by the teacher for how well I performed (she called the person a little unorthodox).

This would've been enough mind candy for me, but somebody, when I asked who they thought it was (you were supposed to leave the name out of it, almost like a contest), said "Jesus". I fought very hard to control my laughter, but inside every ounce of hate melted for a brief moment as the world's greatest joke came into play.

According to this person, Jesus is equal to Hitler. Let me rephrase that in math terms.

Jesus = Hitler

So, that's pretty much it for that story. Next up, I'd like to say that I'm tired of Facebook. More or less, I'm tired of seeing status messages like, "I'm tired of the world, it's growing cold. The dark clouds firing overhead". It makes me want to go do them a favor and give them cyanide capsules for their own descretion.

Worse than that, though, is the song lyrics. Like they didn't even try. "And she's buying a stairway to heaven"...is it that hard to just put, "I love the song Stairway to heaven"

OR

Do what I do, and make the status message one sentence, which looks nicer, and doesn't piss me the fuck off so I have to make stupid little rants like this one.

However, nothing, and I mean nothing, compares to the amount of rage I feel when I see one person's status update. It's the same every fucking day. "Love you forever and ever"..."Is missing my baby. Forever and ever." It gets progressively worse. "I love you (name) forever and ever, I'm missing you, Love you baby." ... "I know things are hard right now, but it's gonna be alright. I love you forever and ever and ever and ever, Missing you and thinking of you always (Name) forever and ever, Love you baby"

I want to punch this person in the face when I see their status messages.

So, we've pretty much covered the status updaters. The drama queens, the lyrics, the relationship freaks...oh yea, I forgot the normal people who put, "going to friends. Be back later"...and people like me. Some of my recent posts:

"Adam may or may not be Jesus."
"Adam can fly in his dreams. He cannot fly in real life. Thus, he is sad."
"Adam wishes for telekenesis."
"Adam may not be the bomb, but he's still liable to explode."

I like the updates you can laugh at. That's my type of updates. Occasionally, I'll toss a link up for an Awesome show. Or something like that. I just get tired of seeing people's attempts to spill their guts out on Facebook. I have been guilty of this crime, though, so I feel ashamed. However, after a swift kick in the ass, I'm back on track, spreading the random word around like a virus.

Some quick notes. The new Star Trek was awesome, as was "Miss March". The Whitest Kids U' Know are some of the most talented comedians in history, and I hope they flourish for a long time. A very long time.

Well, I'm tired. I'll wrap this up with a good old fashioned generic line like this one and call it a night.